A Different Gift

This Christmas has felt a bit different to me. I have tried to keep things a bit simpler knowing my back isn't in the best state.

Over the past two weeks when I would normally be baking up a storm and hitting the shops almost daily, my back pain has been increasing which has taken some of the joy out of Christmas preparations.

A week or two back, I was feeling somewhat sorry for myself. Actually I was feeling frustrated and ripped off that I can't physically do the things I feel I 'should' be able to do. It being Christmas time made me feel worse about it. Getting the invoice for my doctors fees certainly didn't bring any merriment!

Anthony and I discussed our situation and decided to lay all our cards on the table, from doctors counsel to our own feelings, in prayer. I would have liked everything to be easier and less painful. Instead we felt a distinct impression to make sure I rest and be careful not to overdo it, particularly because it is important to be in a good state for surgery. It seems the increasing pain isn't going to improve.

The impression received was something I knew, but needed to be reminded of. To be wise with my limitations, especially at times like this when I don't want to.

But the days following were the real blessing for me. Ever since, I have felt so incredibly blessed to have the family and friends I have. It has been as if it has been pushed to the forefront of my mind constantly.

I have wonderful friends who show love and support for me when I need it most.

I have incredible family who do so much for me and my boys. They call and email to see how I am doing, help with the boys, and hop on a plane when I need help.

I have my sons who are the sunshine in my day. They sometimes smother me with love, but I know it's just that they want to be near me.

And I have my Anthony. I don't have a perfect marriage (who does), but I have the fairytale. I have what so many people in the world are searching for. Someone who truly loves me and who I love back. Someone who can spend all day with me and not be sick of me. Someone who tirelessly works for our family without complaint and who still picks up the slack at the times I can't do all the "mum jobs" I usually do. Someone who I just love to be with. I have a happy marriage.

These things have been swimming in my minds for days now and I can see that has been the best blessing I could ask for. Things are a little tough for me right now, but that feeling that I have so much to be thankful for is overwhelming. It has made my Christmas special indeed.

Merry Christmas and Happy New Year to all of you!